12 Jun Saint Arnold Lawnmower Kolsch

Saint Arnold Lawnmower Kolsch

Saint Arnold Brewing Company

North Downtown Houston
Kolsch
ABV: 4.9%
IBUs: 18
Packaging: Draft, 6 pack 12-ounce cans, 6 pack 12-ounce bottles, 19.2-ounce stovepipe cans

Back in December of 2020, my wife and I sold our house and moved into an apartment. It was a tough decision, but when she became a licensed social worker, we knew we’d probably need to end up moving from the suburbs once she found her job. As hard as it was to sell a house that we just finished remodeling exactly to our spec, one of the hardest things for me has been not having a lawn!

We had a huge lawn, so it was a backbreaker, but there was something rewarding about cracking open a cold one to signify the end of a sweaty afternoon. Saint Arnold Lawnmower was often in the rotation because, well, duh.

The updated art features the Patron Saint chillin’ in a short sleeve shirt alongside a flamingo, soccer ball, and a horseshoe, and it’s all flanked by a grassy-looking little illustrative pattern. I love Saint Arnold’s art almost as much as the beer!

Saint Arnold Lawnmower pours just as fancy as its full name. The chalk-white head rises up with tiny, frothy, little bubbles. The brilliantly clear straw yellow color is as welcoming as it is appropriate for a yard cuttin’ beer. The story behind the name is an interesting one! 

“When it came to naming the beer, we performed our typical expensive, highly sophisticated consumer research program. We made a sheet of paper with five potential beer names on it: Select, Blonde, Kölsch, Golden and Fancy Lawnmower Beer. We then went around to any parties or bars we were at and handed out these sheets to have people rate their perception of the quality of the beer with each name on a scale of 1 to 5. If we just averaged the totals, Golden would have won. People rated Fancy Lawnmower Beer either a 1 or a 5, but all anyone wanted to talk about, no matter what they rated it, when they handed their questionnaire in was Fancy Lawnmower Beer.”

I seldom drink straight from the can because I want the full aromatic experience, but every now and then, a cold one straight from the fridge and a koozie were perfect. I hate to miss out on the floral aroma of Hallertauer Hersbrucker hops that shine through so delicately above the slightly sweet malt aromas.

From shelf-warm to RTIC-cooler-ice-cold, the flavor of Saint Arnold Lawnmower never disappoints. The German pale malted barley that makes up 95% of this beer lends to a clean, slightly corny, kinda basic, beer-flavored-beer kinda taste, and I’m in love with it. As it warms, there’s a bit more sweetness on the palette, but we’re talking nuance here. The crisp, clean, dry, finish is accentuated by the high carbonation and subtly floral hops.

This. Beer. Is. Perfect.

That explains why it’s a go-to in my fridge, one of Saint Arnold’s bestsellers, and a 4x GABF medal winner in 2000, 2006, 2007, and 2010, with two bronzes and two golds. Fun fact, it was first brewed in 2000. Imagine earning GABF bronze on day 1. *Kobe*

I’ve heard many times from beer purists and friends that have had the pleasure of touring the German countryside that Kolsch beers in America are not like Kolsch beers in Germany, but something tells me Saint Arnold Lawnmower is pretty high up there. Back Pew Addi’s Faith Kolsch, which is now a Marzen, is one that comes to mind as being comparable, and although it’s very different, the RIP Saint Arnold Weedwacker also comes to mind. Astral Kraftwerk Kolsch is another good one that I’ve enjoyed.

As for where to find Saint Arnold Lawnmower… If you can’t find this beer, you’re in the wrong place. From draft to bottles, 6 packs to stovepipe cans, this is one of the most ubiquitous Houston beers there is. If the establishment you’re at doesn’t have this beer, you might reconsider visiting there ever again. I said what I said.

Beers to you, Houston!